July 31, 2013

BOUNDARIES


You can't always be nice. 
That's how people take advantage of you. 
Sometimes you have to set boundaries. - Qoutes&Thoughts
Lets Talk about BOUNDARIES ... HEALTHY BOUNDARIES.

Source: google Images
Am talking about the "you better know your place" kind.
I had two incidences recently, with two individuals who clearly did not know no better.
They crossed the border line so far off, Keeping them in check was necessary.
I respect boundaries so much so that sometimes it feels like, i am the boundary in itself.

In the book BOUNDARIES by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. john Townsend, there is a chapter on "THE TEN LAWS OF BOUNDARIES ", - ill just share a few

The Law of Sowing and Reaping
For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.
Our actions have consequences. Someone will bear them.
Don’t interrupt this law by regularly bailing others out.
The Law of Responsibility
Everyone is responsible for what they say, do and act.
We are responsible to, not for each other.
We are to love one another, not be one another.
The Law of Power
You only have power over what lies within your own boundary
We do not have power over other people
We hardly have enough power over ourselves 
 The Law of Respect
If we wish our boundaries to be respected we must respect those of others
For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.
 The Law of Motivation
What we let influence/motivate our actions, will determine who/what controls us.
We must be free to say no before we can wholeheartedly say yes.
 "Acts of love” are worthless if we don’t feel to have a choice

 The Law of Evaluation
Setting boundaries leads to honesty, relief from guilt, and better communication of who you are and what you need. It sometimes requires confrontation and hurt feelings, if we do not do this, anger and bitterness will set in because we are not being open about our own limits and needs.
We need to evaluate the effects our boundaries cause others
Hurt and harm are not the same – pain may eventually lead to growth

The Law of Envy
Envy focuses on what our of your boundary ie. what others have accomplished. 
We will never get what we want if we focus on what others have
Envy keeps us empty and unfulfilled
The Law of Exposure
The Law of Exposure says that your boundaries need to be made visible to others and communicated to them.
Boundaries must be communicated
Otherwise they are invisible to others



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