{ JUST.LIKE.DOMINOES

When chasing your dream it will be difficult to do so and stay socially connected. Sometimes You need to go missing! You need time to focus, plan and think when creating a new life for yourself. Trying to create a " new you " while trying to satisfy the " old you " by being in the same places with the same people doing the same actions will be a conflict of interest.

- A Grown Man's Thoughts

Source: tumblr

I feel like somebody just pressed the RESET button on my life. Just like Dominoes, everything is FAAAAAAAALLING-into-place slowly, but surely.
Those heavy dark feelings of being lost and out of purpose are now fading away. *Sigh*
I spent most of my weekend doing cake runs..from one end of the city to the other!!
At 4PM, i was back under the comfort of my Duvet to rest my bones, because on Sunday morning, I had another cake run, just before Sunday Service..
PASSION.. is what makes me wake early and retire late into the night, and do it over & over again.
Not forgetting i still have my job to take care of.
I know I've taken a heavy plunge into business and neglected you ... YES! you & you & you --

I cannot apologise for i am still here..
Even in the dead of silence, am still here...
Even when am missing you, am still here...
Even in the wake of a goodbye, am still here...
Even when i can't be there, am still here...
Because i need to be here, am still there ... there, that very place where you can always find me.
so, find me..Whenever you need me.
When am busy staying focused and creating a new me,
It may slip my mind that some days i need to be THERE and not HERE..
so, find me.
And when we cannot do the important things we used to do importantly together,
Because i have found this more important thing that i need to do importantly solo,
Remind me every so often.. that i need to make time for those important things that we used to do importantly together.

Yours truly.

{ HUGE SIGH ...}

So the last couple of days have been really reaaallly busy...

It feels like time and work stood still while i was away on leave ;( --- lately my desk has managed to turn FENG SHUI to SHUI FENG no longer do i consider it my-harmonious-get-away-from-home-that-pays !! ;(

I COnfess #4 :: That sometimes i get so wrapped in what am doing, that i literally neglect all other aspects of my life.

Through all the craziness, i have managed to stick to my resolution to read! read! and read some more! the 80/20 Principle has been a great how-to-do guide lately.

I decided to put together my EVERYTHING-I HAVE-ALWAYS-WANTED-TO-DO list  and start on it ASAP! am focusing on the things that i love to do... as i work towards other things in my life ;) My list will keep expanding as i go along :)

1. Drive a MANUAL Car!! --- woos! my justification has always been my eye-hand coordination just wont work with a manual, unless i have an emergency like say, i over-beat the ONLY tub of fresh whipping cream and my order is due for delivery in less than an hour--aaaand the person i sent for more cream brought me CHOCOLATE??! so, i take the car keys and say bite me!

2. Finally, enroll for the coveted advanced Cake Classes!! --- and STOP drooooooling over other people's master creations!

3. Finally register my Business Name!! --- Opening my publisher and admiring my logo and soon-to-be business cards will NOT get me there!!

4.  Enroll for Spanish Classes --- the real thing peps! clearly distance learning has not been happening. More distance less learning!! por favor ;)

5. At least ANOTHER professional certification???---huh?? what say you???---yeah??

6. Take a GIANT leap of FAITH, literally ---- Faith, its just me and you ;) lets do this!

7. Develop a NO QUITTER  attitude.
------------
 Plus I've VOWED to start saving up for a major holiday (long term in the near future )! am thinking the Islands..perhaps. we'll see

{ TGIF! TGIF! }

iConfess #3

I like my pancakes burnt! yes! BURNT!
There is something about burnt pancakes... that crusty burnt toasty taste?? ---!!yuuuumm!

Mood

  :: honestly, i've had better days.
 
I'd KILL For

  :: I already have it!! :)

This weekEND

  :: Tusker ..my bad! Safaricom Rugby SEVENS!! ... IYAAAAA! *i will never make peace with Nyayo Stadium as a venue!* -- i'll pass on this one and every other..

 I Need Decided To

  :: give Facebook a blackout for a while.

oooooh! I'm Looking Forward To

  :: My First Couch Surfers meetup. yaaay!

Think About

::

Enjoy Your Weekend :)

{ For Friendships Vs. Words }

" I never ask for nothing I don't demand for myself | Honesty. Loyalty. Friends. then wealth | Death before dishonor and I tell you what else | I tighten my belt before I ask for help | foolish pride is what has held me together through the years | I just play the cards am dealt| I can't say I never knelt before God and asked for better cards at times to no avail |" (Justify My Thug_Jay Z)

iConfess #2

I value my my friendships!! I live by the 100% rule.. give your 100% and walkaway whole. Am not sure if that works for me or against me most of the times??? I am not confrontational...I don't do it on the spot cos I like to marinate over a situation to avoid overreacting. When I still can't wrap it around my head, I speak up.

 :. Did She Just Say That? .:


I walked away feeling very demeaned, disrespected and hurt. I was too shocked to say anything on the spot because my mind went completely blank. It was not what was said, but how it was said...gosh! Who am I kidding? It was everything. I pulled a 'Peps' and told myself it was NO BIG DEAL! so, I went on with things like nothing happened. But deep down,something did happen. I started to question everything...

I Questioned myself----
I Questioned my integrity as a friend ----
I Questioned my friend ---
I Questioned her perception of me. ----
I Questioned why she'd say that or even think that. I still couldn't wrap it around my head, so I spoke up.

{ O.P.P. (Other Person's Property)???

About two or three months ago i lost my BEAUTIFUL polka dot tote umbrella!! i forgot it on a seat in a matatu on a rainy day
This umbrella was special to me.. it was a gift from my Mother dearest from one of her trips to the Americas. I had it for 3 polka dot years.. It would fit snugly in my bag, but when opened it would be large enough to cover three people!!
In the 3 years i'd had it, i NEVER came across one like it around... it was unique!!
I knew, that i would spot it one day.

Yesterday, i was in a matatu..it was drizzling.. traffic was yuuurgh!!  
a woman walks past my window carrying MY polka dot tote umbrella!!!! spoiled on one side just like i remember it!!  OMG!!
*heart racing...eyes popping..fast breathing!! -- MY UMBRELLA!!
I watched her...pace around holding MY umbrella.. debating with my not-sensible self  if i should get out of the car and get MY property?!
Is it still considered MY property?? ---  now that she found it, do i still have claim to it?
Is it now considered O.P.P?

Peps.

{ RECAP MONDAY----- }

I had a pretty decent weekend... No partying involved just a laid back affair.
I met up with my girlfriends!! Simply AMAZING women!! energetic.. inspiring... smart... and a bag 'o chips!!:)
We had a good laugh.. Caught up on our lives...checked in on each others' dream lists and got down to the accountability bit of it... Julie we MISSED you!!
--------

iCONFESS #1

I am very personal person and have always kept a low profile and a very small social circle ever since i could walk... Somewhere down the line, i have made a DECISION or CHOICE to change this.
I decided to share my life in order to get one!!
Moving from NO SHARE to MORE SHARE is not the simplest of transitions..
I most recently joined Couch Surfer.. If you don't know what this is, its a traveling community where you host traveler(s) from all over the world and you get hosted as well... the Kenyan community is quite active...and i intend to make the best of it.. *am hoping*
Am super CAREFUL not to get social-burnout --- because at some point, i tend to feel overwhelmed or suffocated or squeezed...
In order to create a healthy balance, I've come up with my own rules --

Rule#-1:: Get out of your comfort zone.
Rule#0:: Smile
Rule#1:: One Friend At A Time.
Rule#2:: NEVER walk away from an opportunity to meet someone new.
Rule#3:: TALK MORE...
Rule#4:: Do what 'Peps' wouldn't do.
Rule#5:: The worst anyone can say is NO. So, just do it!
Rule#6:: Know when to walk away.
Rule#7:: Have FUN!
Rule#8:: APPLY THE BLOODY RULES!!

I'll make up more rules as i go along:)